Another surrogate mother
Hello galactic wizards,
I just talked to someone who is using a surrogate mother right now (in fact, she was about to go meet her for her 21-week doc appt).
This woman went through an agency. The agency has 12 clients using surrogate mothers.
The main deterrent? Price...
Total cost is a little North of $100,000. This includes:
- $25K for the surrogate, payable in installments throughout the pregnancy.
- legal and agency fees
- health insurance contributions for the surrogate mother (regular insurance won't cover this so she had to get a new policy established)
- medical bills for the surrogate mother
- misc. expenses (gas and mileage when she goes to doctor's appointment, etc...) managed through the agency.
Compared to this, the cost of owning a boat is negligible ;-)
The cost of IVF cycles (also expensive...between $6K to $10K) is not included. In my case, I would probably want to do at least one other cycle.
This woman got help from her family. She also looked into adoption apparently, and that was around $50K or so. Definitely a little steep...Not quite sure how I'll handle that yet, although
I am sure that there is a solution to every problem out there.
It took about 2 months for them to find a surrogate mothers because they picked the 3rd one. They saw a new one every 3 weeks. The surrogate mothers are screened (they need to have at least one child, stable relationship, etc...). You can ask them questions, they pick you and you pick them (for example, this woman wanted to know what the surrogate was planning to do with the money. The surrogate replied that they would buy a new car because their current car is getting too small for them and their son)
She also chose to spend a lot of time with the surrogate mother, going with her to doctor's appointment, meeting her regularly. She said that she felt indebted to her and she would do anything for her surrogate, so maintaining a good relationship was important to her. She knows one other person who decided not to have anything to do with the surrogate mother (everything can be done "remotely", eg through others).
Not stress-free. The surrogate was an ex-smoker and apparently was "tempted" at times...
This woman also offered to make herself available if I decided to go through this, help me select a surrogate, handle the process, etc...
How does this make me feel? Happy for her, comforted by the idea that there isn't a 10-year wait time before you can find a woman who's volunteering to lend you a uterus and maybe a little surprised at the cost? It may push things out a bit, or will probably force me to make choices (eg, house Vs baby). But hey! That's what life is all about, choices!
And if you want my 2 cents: get regular medical check-ups and screening, maintain a healthy lifestyle and diet which would include not smoking. It's a lot cheaper to be healthy!!!
I just talked to someone who is using a surrogate mother right now (in fact, she was about to go meet her for her 21-week doc appt).
This woman went through an agency. The agency has 12 clients using surrogate mothers.
The main deterrent? Price...
Total cost is a little North of $100,000. This includes:
- $25K for the surrogate, payable in installments throughout the pregnancy.
- legal and agency fees
- health insurance contributions for the surrogate mother (regular insurance won't cover this so she had to get a new policy established)
- medical bills for the surrogate mother
- misc. expenses (gas and mileage when she goes to doctor's appointment, etc...) managed through the agency.
Compared to this, the cost of owning a boat is negligible ;-)
The cost of IVF cycles (also expensive...between $6K to $10K) is not included. In my case, I would probably want to do at least one other cycle.
This woman got help from her family. She also looked into adoption apparently, and that was around $50K or so. Definitely a little steep...Not quite sure how I'll handle that yet, although
I am sure that there is a solution to every problem out there.
It took about 2 months for them to find a surrogate mothers because they picked the 3rd one. They saw a new one every 3 weeks. The surrogate mothers are screened (they need to have at least one child, stable relationship, etc...). You can ask them questions, they pick you and you pick them (for example, this woman wanted to know what the surrogate was planning to do with the money. The surrogate replied that they would buy a new car because their current car is getting too small for them and their son)
She also chose to spend a lot of time with the surrogate mother, going with her to doctor's appointment, meeting her regularly. She said that she felt indebted to her and she would do anything for her surrogate, so maintaining a good relationship was important to her. She knows one other person who decided not to have anything to do with the surrogate mother (everything can be done "remotely", eg through others).
Not stress-free. The surrogate was an ex-smoker and apparently was "tempted" at times...
This woman also offered to make herself available if I decided to go through this, help me select a surrogate, handle the process, etc...
How does this make me feel? Happy for her, comforted by the idea that there isn't a 10-year wait time before you can find a woman who's volunteering to lend you a uterus and maybe a little surprised at the cost? It may push things out a bit, or will probably force me to make choices (eg, house Vs baby). But hey! That's what life is all about, choices!
And if you want my 2 cents: get regular medical check-ups and screening, maintain a healthy lifestyle and diet which would include not smoking. It's a lot cheaper to be healthy!!!
posted by Finance Monkey at 12:24 PM
3 Comments:
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